Falling off a bike hurts.

When mountain biking, falling down doesn't hurt too bad. There is not too much speed involved (for me), and hopefully, there is a soft patch of dirt beneath you to catch your fall, followed by a good dose of laughter follows.
Today I fell off my bike. My ROAD bike.
No dirt. No laughter. 
I have a chainring shaped contusion.
It's pretty. Not.

Luckily, I was going REALLY slow. Painfully slow.

Coach has me doing some short big gear efforts at a low cadence to work on making me stronger. I've done them before, and I really enjoy this workout. It's challenging, constantly changing, and doesn't make me feel like death by the end.

The last time I did this workout, I could only barely use my biggest gear (a big improvement from my earlier failure at trying to push a big gear at all), and I had to use a flat grade or be inside on the trainer. Today I had to find a HILL, IN MY BIGGEST GEAR, to get the right amount of force.
HOW COOL IS THAT!?!?
(a little bit excited here)

Toward the end of my workout, I decided to make the last effort on a bigger, longer hill. The stuff inspiration is made of ;-)

To my surprise, I did it, did it well, and then I got chased by a dog.
Not kidding.

At then end of a hard workout, going uphill, in my biggest gear, being chased by a slobbering, growling, angry dog. I was living my worst nightmare.

He came out of NOWHERE. I was in my happy zone, solving all the world's peace problems, hammering up this hill at like, 3mph, not bothering a soul.
It wasn't like I could pick up the speed. My legs were toast at that specific moment.
I couldn't get unclipped from my pedals because I was freaked out too bad by this growling dog who acted like he was about to eat me.
So, I fell down.

There were no cars around, thankfully. I quickly got up and got my bike between me and the dog, which finally intimidated him enough to back off and go home. Sheesh!

He was a beautiful, young golden retriever. I am sure he is a well-loved member of someone's family.

This is why you need to restrain your pets: if there had been a car coming in either direction, he or I would have been flattened and sent to heaven by now.

Nobody needs to die because of a simple bicycle ride or an unrestrained dog.

I often hear dog owners say, "Oh, he won't hurt you. He doesn't bite."
You may be right, but let me explain why dogs and bikes are a dangerous duo:

Your sweet pooch does run out in the road when he sees me coming...even the well trained ones. He could get hit by a car because he is paying more attention to chasing me than the car coming toward him. I've seen that happen. It was so very sad; I still cry when I think about that poor little dog. This isn't all about me and my safety; I want your furry family member to stay safe too. Dogs simply don't know or understand the dangers of moving vehicles - and they certainly do not prioritize safety like we do.

Even sweet dogs bark and growl and act in a "I'm going to eat you for dinner" kind of way when they see a bicycle. My dog, who has never been aggressive, even does that, and she sees me ride almost daily. It's just how they are. Besides the fact that it totally freaks me out, it makes me seriously question my safety. I have no way to know if your dog has rabies or not, or if he is a biter or not, or if he is aggressive or sweet.

In the excitement of seeing a moving bicycle, your adorable little dog runs along side me...and then in front of me...because he's trying to play with me. Cute? Yes. Dangerous? Absolutely. I'm genuinely happy that your dog is healthy enough to be outside, running and playing. I want my dog to have fun too. However, if anything, especially a moving object, comes in contact with a moving bicycle, the object wins. Every time. The bicycle rider is then the proud owner of a new concussion, bruises, and broken bones.

The truth: I love dogs. I have one. And two cats. They are part of my family and I would die if I knew that my dog was hurt or a danger to another being. She stays in my yard, under my control at all times for the safety of herself and others.

The truth: Riding my bike is dangerous. I get that. It is less dangerous than being nearly 100lbs overweight and sedentary. That was me, 4 years ago. Riding inspires me and keeps me motivated to stay healthy. I love my family dearly and I have a huge job to do in my community. I want to keep doing it; I have to stay healthy to keep doing it.

The truth: Here, it is illegal for a person to ride a bike on the sidewalk. Bikes are only allowed on the public roadways; sidewalks are for walking. I will get a ticket for riding my bike on the sidewalk, so please don't ask me to move to the sidewalk when I commute to work.

The truth: Here, it is illegal for a moving vehicle to come within 3 feet of a cyclist. A car is allowed to pass a bike on the road, as long as the cyclist is given 3 feet of clearance between the car and the bike. I drive a car, too, and understand how irritating it is to be held up in traffic. Please, be patient and wait the extra 30 seconds it takes to provide that 3 feet of space. Remember, you don't actually have to come in contact with a cyclist to create a wreck, because of the air vacuum the car creates as it zooms by.

The truth: Here, it is illegal for pets to be unrestrained on public property (think: roads). All animals in your care are required to be under your control at all times, or on your property. I can't come on your property; you can't allow your property to come to me. If your furry family member is out in the road and causes an accident, the animal's owner is at full fault and will be legally and financially responsible for all damage to health and property. That means - if your dog chases me again and I get bitten or if he runs in front of me and causes a crash where I break a bone or my bike, you get to pay for a new bike and a new bone.

Be responsible. Be helpful. Love your furry friends. Keeping them safe will keep all of us safe.

I'm off to find some Arnica for this bruise...

off season wrap-up

I'm a new athlete. Not just new, but I only accidentally tripped into this world of fitness and cycling. I've been making music since before I spoke my first words; I've only been moving my body for 4 years. I approach everything as if it is music, and that has worked so far: practice the basics, set goal, practice new skills, seek assistance, practice, practice, stay focused, practice, practice, practice, keep the intensity up, practice more, perform, practice, repeat.

Before now, I was so unfit that I NEEDED to keep the consistency up all year round (like in the music world). I did that for a couple of years, lost a bunch of weight, and created a base of fitness for endurance sports. Got healthy: Check.

But being an endurance athlete is NOTHING like that. There's all this stuff called "rest," "active recovery," "testing," "work load," "periodization," "off season," etc.

You mean, I can't just stay on a straight, consistent trajectory from here to where I want to be?
Mind. Blown.

My first off season was lots of fun and I'm eager to go faster, be stronger, and have fun now that the weather is above freezing.

Here are a few pictures from my very fun first off season :-)

The last race of 2013: Beach to Battleship Full Triathlon. 

This Ship Just Got Real team: Kris the fish, Me the pedaler, and Jason who runs like the wind. 

Our team got 3rd place in our category :-) Placing in a sport event was a first EVER for me. 

I did the bike portion. 112 miles. In a headwind. In 6ish hours. In my VK Kit. They took my bike from me, and I wasn't quite sure what to do with myself, after cycling THOUSANDS of miles over the course of that year in prep for this.

Off Season has officially begun!!!

Lots of sweating happened at the YMCA. Here, Lauren convinced me to join this huge 2 hour group class. She said, "Come on, it'll be fun!" But really, this was a death payback from several months earlier when I made her do a dozen hill repeats with me.  We're even, now, right???

I took up Aerial Silks! Super fun, really cool people, and a great core workout

I even tried cyclocross. One of our superstar juniors needed a girl to be on his relay team - I was the only girl around who wasn't already racing. I told him that if he found me a bike, shoes, and a helmet, I would do it. Less than 5minutes later, he shows up with all the gear and great big grin on his face :-)  I couldn't say no.

Hiking in the redwoods in California with my brother John and at Bays Mountain with my John.

Lots of fun cold rides with my buddy Kim, and one little mountain bike ride with Lauren. (You might actually call it hike-a-bike because I spent more time walking my mountain bike than riding it.)

 I did a little traveling. I went to visit family in Georgia (and stopped by the Goats on the Roof attraction along the way) and San Francisco, CA to see my brother. I also went to visit friends (and my fur friends - Tillie May loves when I bring my bike to her house) in Charlottesville, VA and went to a music therapy reunion (10 years!) at Tennessee Tech.

 There was a lot of music making this Winter, too. Had my first symphony solo that I didn't trash in performance, and shared music with my athlete friends. That was the BEST feeling in the world :-) Thanks for coming to hear us play, Kim and John!

 And the best part of all was being selected to be a Vanderkitten VIP!!!

Climbed my first three mountains of the year, yesterday. I'm ready to get off the trainer, out of the gym, and into the sunshine :-) Let the ONseason begin!!!

"let yourself be a beginner. nobody starts out as an expert."

Yesterday was Pi Day. And my 33rd birthday. And it was sunny.

In all things, I'm super happy with what my life has become. I spent the first third figuring out what I wanted my life to be about: making my community a better place by being inspired to be a better human and loving people. That's all. I get to spend the next third just doing that; I'm pretty excited about this next part :-)

In my endeavor to get inspired and be a better person, I had this test to do on my bike. I was super excited to do it, on my birthday, with my friend Liane. She's such a happy and brave athlete - she inspires me to be strong and keep going.

John asked me, "Well, did you study good?" Ha! He's so cute.

The test is simple: ride as hard as you can, for 20 min.
The results are simple: take your watts produced - 5% to get functional threshold power.
The interpretation is simple: This is the magic number to base training on in the coming weeks so you don't over or under work yourself. It is a measure of getting stronger, as compared to previous tests.

So, it's my birthday, I'm super excited and ready to blow this test out of the water, and take my training up a notch...and I basically do the same as I did last time. Which was MONTHS ago. What?!?!

I was so confused. I was SURE that I was stronger, faster, better, and all that stuff that makes an athlete. Last year, I was used to making these huge shifts. Exciting shifts. Inspiring shifts. And I've heard more than a few fellow athletes comment to me about how much faster I am this year. It made sense that the number would jump up significantly.

But no, it was an incremental change of just a couple watts. Does that mean that all my effort is for nothing? Does that mean that this confidence I've grown into is a falsehood? Does that mean that this is as good as it gets and I should quit now? Are my friends exaggerating when they say, "Sybil, you're so strong this year." Seriously, these are the silly questions that initially happened in my head, all because of a silly 3-digit number that Garmin gives me.

Being a therapist, I occasionally have this funky expectation that I SHOULD be able to handle everything with grace, acceptance, and joy, without ever struggling with feelings of disappointment, sadness, anger and fear - as if I should be immune to those negative feelings. Ha! I have to remember that disappointment, sadness, fear, and anger are PART of being a better human. Trying to not have those feelings isn't the point - it's what we do with them once they come around. I do know this in my head and my heart, but I forget sometimes. I'm human. It is just another facet of myself to work on cleaning.

I didn't let it ruin my day. Don't worry. I had a fabulous birthday filled with the people I love, doing the things I love - capped off with yummy sushi and a cupcake :-)

This new incrementally larger 3-digit magic number does make me ask bigger, deeper questions about myself. About why I spend so much time believing what I am is never enough. About how to handle disappointment and fear. About how to get inspired on a new level. About why I expect so much of myself. About why I don't allow myself to rejoice in the small things. About why I'm in such a hurry all the time. About what my life is for.

It also helps that I have an amazing coach who reminded me that this is just March; I have lots of time to keep getting stronger. I have to remember that I've only been riding a bike for barely 2&1/2 years - being better takes time. I'm allowed to still be a beginner; I simply don't have the experience of a cyclist who has been working hard for a decade. He's such a happy and encouraging guy; his insight and wisdom is much appreciated.

As it stands now, I'm super excited about my new magic number. This number is a happy birthday present to myself that represents 2 years of hard work, sweat, dedication, inspiration, and a personal commitment to excellence. It is my springboard for success and is enough for now. I want to win something, and this magic number is the first step toward that experience.

My bike is my metaphor.

Pedal therapy at its finest :-)

Exactly Average

From the book, The Fear Project:
We all start out at different levels in any skill set we try. No matter where you start out on the genetic totem pole, research shows that training is what makes you excel. Even the most gifted athletes and thinkers result more often from better training than better genetics. In multiple studies, soccer players performed better than average on soccer skills. Obviously. But they performed exactly average on simple reflex and reaction time skills. The same has been shown of musicians and chess players.

Why is this important to me?

Because I'm exactly average on the genetic totem pole. Exactly average. IQ. Reaction times. Emotional intelligence. Learning ability. Physical ability. I'm as average as it gets.

But I have extraordinary dreams.

I want to make a big impact on the world around me and be a big piece of the world peace puzzle. And I want to win bike races. And I want to create beautiful music. And I want to travel the world. And, and, and ....
How can I do all of that extraordinary stuff if I'm exactly average?

Because it's not about genetics. It's about training.
Thank God!!!

I'm not an extraordinary musician. But I put the extra time in to be an equal with my peers who are extraordinary. This was evident last night at the Johnson City Symphony Concert. I get to be surrounded by incredible local musicians who push me to be better and better with each concert cycle. A beautiful thing to experience.

I'm not an extraordinary athlete. But I'm putting in the time to get faster and fitter (and having a blast along the way!).

Practice is something I am good at. Because I'm exactly average :-)

Three cheers for the average people of the world! WooHoo Woo Hoo WooHoo!!!

This is the exact reason I love Vanderkitten: ordinary women, achieving extraordinary things. They get it.

Impact.

Word of the Year

Every year in January, I choose a word to focus on, in place of new year's resolutions. This personal tradition started in 2007. Peace. Drive. Joy. Be. Hope. Fun. Power. It is a simple way of adding a little focus to my constantly chaotic life.

2013 was a big year for me. Don't we always say that? Actually, they've all been big years for me. I've come to appreciate all of the years I've been blessed with, even the hard ones. My word for this year was POWER. I really wanted to step into myself, be more fully ME, and take responsibility that comes with power. It happened. 

I traveled out of the country for the first time, and I did it solo.

I graduated my GIM program and finished my MARI training.

I decided to buy a house and began that long process.

I dropped some weight, dropped body fat and got significantly stronger.

I raced in my first bike race and placed as high as 3^rd in the season

I expanded my business, making a bigger impact on the community

I also screwed up. A lot.

This year is no different. Extraordinary Impact is my focus for 2014. Extraordinary, as in celebratory fireworks for a life worth rejoicing. Impact, as in demolishing old beliefs and habits that no longer serve me. Extraordinary, as in clearing the way for newness and efficiency. Impact, as in energy to see tasks and projects to completion. Extraordinary Impact.

I love a good story.

I love a good story, but not Snow White.

Snow White is not one of my favorite stories because of the ending. I don't like the idea of encouraging women to need a prince to save them from misfortune. This morning, I was watching Mirror Mirror, a re-telling of the Snow White story. It tells an ending that demonstrates strength in personal exploration, staying true to your values, and believing in yourself. When you do those three things, you no longer need a hero to save you, but become the hero yourself. A lovely re-telling.

I have determination, a ferocious sense of adventure, and a stuck-ness to my values that gets me in trouble occasionally. OK, often. This “believe in yourself” thing is still a new concept.

This past year, I spent a lot of time on my bike. More than 6,000 miles is kind of a lot, right? I spent the entire year figuring out how to believe in myself. I entered into several road races, and I slowly started to figure it out. I kept clicking off the miles and meeting my goals, one after another, after another. 

It wasn't until the Bridge to Bridge ride that it all came together for me. This is a 102 mile ride, of pure hill (no pun intended), to the top of Grandfather Mountain in North Carolina. All by myself. No teammates. No riding buddies. Nobody to save me from the work that must be done. Just me, my bike, and 6+ hours of pedaling. I got to the top, and I finally “got it.” All the times my coach, parents, John, and friends believed in me finally felt like a reality.

After finding this new belief in myself as an athlete and all-around powerful woman, I decided to apply to be a Vanderkitten VIP. Vanderkitten is a brand of stylish women's gear for women who want to make an impact. They also sponsor a pro women's cycling team. Their motto is: Extraordinary women doing extraordinary things. Pretty cool, yes?

Vanderkitten has done something really special by creating a VIP association for the every day athlete. They saw a need for a new kind of support in women's cycling and took action, creating a network of influential athletic women all over the world to support each other and support the mission of the Vanderkitten way: encouraging women to believe in themselves, be strong, and be awesome in everything they do. 

Plus, Vanderkitten dreams to find a solution to gender discrimination in sport (did you know that women athletes earn LESS THAN HALF of what men earn? And for the SAME WORK? Ridiculous that this kind of discrimination still exists, not only in sport, but in the work force too). 

Being a Vanderkitten VIP is kind of like being on a team of strong women from all over the world, who are like minded, have big dreams, and want to empower each other in sport and life. I applied to be a VIP, along with 2,000 or so others. Just a hundred or so were chosen...INCLUDING ME!!! 

They chose me!!! 

I was so excited I cried.

My adventures in weight loss, running, swimming, and cycling over the past few years have taught me so much about life, most recently about believing in myself. I am honored that Vanderkitten chose to believe in me and my mission too. I am honored to encourage women to be awesome in whatever they choose to do. I am honored to have the capacity to pass on the inspiration that helped me overcome my own barriers.

The dwarfs in Snow White knew the power of teaching Snow White to believe in herself.

Vanderkitten knows the power of encouraging women to believe in themselves in real life.

She will succeed. 

Seemingly impossible obstacles will become possible to her. 

She will make a lasting and positive impact on the world around her. 

I am a Vanderkitten.

An extraordinary woman, attempting extraordinary things.

What I do is not who I am, sort of...

I am a lot of things, and what I do is not one of those things.

I have done some really cool things this summer. Amazing to me, really, considering where I started from last season, and that I just started cycling regularly 6 months ago and running regularly 3 months ago.

15lbs lighter
Completed my first triathlon AND won 2nd place in my category with the fastest bike split in my age group
PR'd my 5k at 29:58
Ran the Crazy 8's and PR'd my 8k at 52:00
Completed 3 Metric Century rides
Rode in my first bike race, finishing 25min faster than my goal, and 2nd in my age group
Climbed Mt Mitchell, the highest mountain peak this side of the Mississippi River
Finished the Roan Moan with a smile on my face and not a single moan
Climbed 5 mountains total: Buffalo, Bays, Iron, Mitchell, Roan
Ran 12 miles - for fun!

And it's still only July!

It would be very easy for me to say, loot at me!!! I'm now a budding cyclist. I'm an athlete. I'm a runner. I am...you name it.

But really, I am not any of those things. This is just what I do, in response to who I am: determined, focused, connected, introverted, ambitious, adrenaline junkie, gentle, forgiving, accepting, creative, quick learner, curious, etc.

It has not been all triumph and sweet victory. I've shed my share of tears, frustration, and disappointment. It is really hard work hauling my body and my trusty Trek up one of the highest peaks in the region. And even harder work to bring my mind to a place that allows me to do it again, and again, and again, always chasing from behind, with a smile on my face and the motivation to keep trying.

I am quite proud of myself for using who I am to get my butt up those mountains. For letting go of that extra weight. For putting my Brooks on even when I did not feel like moving. For packing up the bike even when I was filled with doubt. For pushing my self imposed limits back significantly. For fully experiencing life, the best way I know how.

All this sweat (and the very cool views from the top of the mountains) not only expresses who I am inside, but makes me more of who I am. I like that.